Through mistakes and sometimes no fault of their own, many adults have
to bring up children on their own without a spouse's help. They are single
parents. While this is not the state God intended for them or their children,
wise individuals in this situation will strive to teach their children
the same godly principles that are applicable to all. Here are a few additional
principles to keep in mind if you are a divorced or never-married single
parent:
When your child asks why his father (or mother) doesn't also live in
the home, explain that you and the other parent made a mistake. Make clear
that the child isn't a mistake or at fault but that you and the child's
other parent made a mistake. Tell your child that God says a husband and
wife should remain married for life. Tell him that if God blesses you
with another spouse, that is what you plan to do next time. Assure the
child that you love him and that you will be there for him.
Don't speak evil of your former spouse. You don't need to create extra
anger and resentment in your children. As they mature, they will form
their own opinions of both parents. Modeling godly conduct is always your
best course of action.
Remember that you are the parent, the loving authority figure responsible
for providing stability for your children. Don't make your child or children
your confidants with whom you discuss your intimate feelings, dreams and
fears. Once they are grown and fully mature, then you can enter the friendship
stage of life.
If you are contemplating a new marriage, make sure your children love
and respect your future spouse. If they don't, weigh their feelings and
concerns heavily. If you develop a close, loving, respectful relationship
with your children and they feel secure, they shouldn't feel threatened
when another adult enters their lives.
